Meet Big Tex, the New Commish

To answer the previous post’s question, it was coitus interruptus.

Let’s talk about feelings for a minute, for it is feelings that dominate the soul of a sports fan.

Imagine that you are a fan of an irrelevant school’s football program – oh, I dunno, pick anyone you can think of (hint: Oklahoma State, Texas Tech) – and imagine that the AD of a rival (think Texas) has called your school’s ‘equal’ to tell him to shut up and do as he says, or else. “If I go to the Pac-10, you will too, Kiddo, or I will burn your house down and eat your babies. If I go to the SEC, you will too, Boyo, or I will take your wife and send you pictures. And, if I choose to stay in what’s left of the Big XII, you will too, Pinko, or I will tell everybody of your past indiscretions and come out smelling like the yellow rose that I am.”

“And, oh, by the way, if I stay, I will be setting up my own television network and will give you none of the revenues, because you are nothing – you are lower that the ticks that feed on Bevo’s body.”

Just imagine your school being relegated to suck the hind tit of a longhorn cow.

Source: Shaggybevo.com

Well, this isn’t exactly what happened over the past few days, ending with the announcement out of Austin that Texas declined the Pac-10’s invitation to become a member of America’s first college super-conference. But, it surely would feel that way if you were a supporter of Okie State or Texas Tech.

Instead of feeling like your school is an equal member of a cohesive group under the direction/guidance of an independent leader/arbiter (e.g., a conference with a commissioner), your impression would be that your school is a mere subject of a feudal lord, a soldier for a warlord within a tribal system. And the feudal lord or warlord would be one of your supposed equal co-members.

It’s not your school that is the real target of some other figurehead with the job-performance goal of making loads of money via cannibalization (think Larry Scott, commissioner of the Pac-10). No. It’s not about you. Instead, you are just there; you are allowed to dance only if the prom queen and her maids (think OU who would do anything for their ‘partnership’ with Texas, and Texas A&M who proved too afraid to bolt for the SEC) come too. You are then relegated to go on about your business feeling like you are the red-headed stepchild that you really are; the adopted member of the family with no bloodline.

Some may like to thank Texas for staving off the implosion of the Big XII that may have led to an undesirable change in the college football landscape. “Oh, thank you good and kind sir for saving the college sports world that we know and love!”

Others will see Texas as Notre Dame South – an institution with such an inflated view of itself that they just knighted themselves leader of college sports, and of their own conference (and BTW, the Gold Domers have lots of thanks to give the Longhorns for keeping their independence). Big XII commissioner Dan Beebe may have done a yeoman’s job of salvaging his conference, but he will go forth forever beholden to Austin’s power brokers.

Dan, meet Big Tex, the New Commish.

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What just happened? The Big 12’s great escape, in perspective. [Dr. Saturday]

Big 12 unites over miracle money, but not much else. [Dr. Saturday]

Big 12 Says It Is Happy With 10. [NY Times]

Sprints Examines the Death of the Death of the Big XII and the End of Realignment // 06.15.10 [Team Speed Kills]

Realignment Post Mortem [Get The Picture]

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss: (non) expansion wrap-up [Garnet and Black Attack]

Thread: The Way of The World-Conference Realignment Redux in MS Paint -Part 2 p.6 [Shaggybevo.com]

Longhorns to rescue for Notre Dame [ESPN.com]